Newly obtained media that I need to observe

3rd Rock from the Sun - Complete Series Seasons 1 - 6
American History X
Artificial Intelligence
A Scanner darkly (again)
Battle Royale
Blade Runner
Bob Ross - The Joy of Painting collection
Confidence
Dark City (again)
Dexter - Season 4
Douglas Adams - The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
Edgar Allen Poe Stories read by Christopher Walken
Encounters at the End of the World
Equilibrium
Erik J. Wielenberg - Value and Virtue in a Godless Universe
Futurama - Complete Series Seasons 1 - 4
Gattaca
Generation Kill
Idiocracy
Irreversible
Lewis Black - Me of Little Faith
Life - BBC Bluray
Metropolis
Michio Kaku - Parallel Worlds
Michio Kaku - Physics of the Impossible
Michio Kaku - Visions
Modern Times
Odin Zeus McGaffer - Does God Get Diarrhea?
Platoon
Religulous (need to watch again)
Richard Dawkins - The Blind watchmaker
Richard Dawkins - The Greatest Show on Earth
Richard Dawkins - The Selfish Gene
Seinfeld - Complete Series Seasons 1 - 9
Serenity
Sigmund Freud - Complete Psychological Works of
Southland Tales
Spun
Starship Troopers
Taking Woodstock
The Office US - Seasons 1 - 4
The Twilight Zone - Complete Definitive Collection Seasons 1 - 5
THX
Twelve Monkeys
Un Chien Andalou (again)
V for Vendetta
X Files - Complete Series Seasons 1 - 9

Many inspired by this list.

(The hilarious part is, there's like 20 more.) :-/,

Great times

In Cali now, we picked up a Prius rental for the drive to Vegas, which we'll start in a couple hours, staying in Caesar's Palace... Set up an appointment to get four tattoos done on Tuesday, and Phil is getting one then as well.

Daddy what's it gonna be like in the year 2000?

Well sweetheart, for your sake, I hope it'll all be peaches and cream.

But I'm afraid the end time is near.

The cataclysmic apocalypse

referred to in the scriptures of every holy book known to mankind.

It will be an era fraught with boundless greed and corruption.

Where global monetary systems disintegrate,

leaving brother to kill brother for a grain of overcooked rice.

The nations of the civilized world will collapse,

under the oppressive weight of parasitic political conspiracies,

which remove all hope and optimism, from their once faithful citizens.

Around the globe, generations of polluters will be punished for their sins.

Unshielded by the ozone layer they have successfully depleted,

left to bake in the searing naked rays of light.

Wholesale assassinations serve to destabilize every remaining government,

leaving the starving and wicked to fend for themselves.

Bloodthirsty renegade cyborgs, created by tax dodging corporations, reek havoc.

Pissed off androids, tired of being slaves to a godless and gutless system,

where the rich get richer, and the poor get fucked over and out,

unleash total world wide destruction, by means of nuclear holocaust,

annihilating the terrified masses,

leaving in its torturous wake,

nothing but vicious,

cannibalistic,

mutated,

radiated,

and horribly disfigured hordes of satanic killers,

begged on revenge; but against whom?

There are so few left alive.

Starvation reigns supreme,

forcing unlucky survivors to eat anything and anyone in their path.

Massive earthquakes crack the planet's crust like a hollow eggshell,

causing unending volcanic eruptions.

The creatures of the seven seas, unable to escape to certain death upon land, boil in their liquid prison.

Disease encircles the Earth.

Plagues and viruses with no known cause, or cure,

laying waste to whatever draws breath.

And humankind, having proven itself to be nothing more than a race of ruthless scavengers,

fall victim to merciless attack at the hands of interplanetary alien tribes,

who seek to conquer our charred remains. 

This is Extinction Level Event:

The Final World Front.

And there is

Only

One

Year

Left.

Wow, that's cool, I can't hardly wait!

You don't have to, because here it is...

Busta Rhymes - There’s Only One Year Left

New features of the blog

I've recently made a lot of small updates to the blog here, one being splitting off my tattoo postings into their own separate blog, which can be accessed on the left pane under "What to expect of my blogs." Obviously, I'd mentioned this change before.

Another new change is adding pages. These are accessible from the non-blog pages tab on the left navigation pane. I spent a long time on, and am very proud to present, My thoughts, a 5½ page paper, single spaced, which can be found at http://rcarhar.blogspot.com/p/and-it-didnt-give-fuck-about-you-and-i.html

Many thanks to Google for this wondrous tool, provided free of charge and without advertisement, as always, with seemingly unlimited room to breathe.

"And it was the new music and it was timid, humble and stern. It was brown and light brown and sepia. It was almost forgotten; it lays in a ditch on the side of the road you and I drove along once, and it was happy to lie there day dreaming. It stretched into the distance further than you ever thought possible, and it didn't give a fuck about you and I either way."

Cog - The Spine

Check your logistics statistics.

     And I heard the sound of Alice chasing rabbits down a hole. At the end of the day I know, that we work all our lives, to pay for a cage they own. It ain't no coincidence that the whole world is torn in an endless debt. Violence. Illusion they're using to rule us; building their Babylon. But I'm holding out. They use us, laughing as we fall. All that's certain? I am still alive.

     And I know my friends, and I know my enemies. And I know one day peace will come to them. There's no need for this illusionment, my friends. Time has come for lucidity, now begin.

     I've got to feel, I want to feel. I've got to see, I want to see. Just need to hear, I want to hear. I've got to be, just let me be.

     Put down the pen, paperweight pig! Insatiable wants and greed. The weekends are the only time I really live!

     Kiss your wife, not that intern. Corporate world has no u-turn. If you applied, then just don't return. 

     Trapped in a cubical, I'm throwing a party in my head. It's all meaningless.

     Yes, were coming 'round to deliver. We'll get it in, put it in you. It's all around, all around you, 1010011010!

     I've got to feel, I want to feel. I've got to see, I want to see. Just need to hear, I want to hear. See...

     Sounds like lies. Who denies?

     Change me into; change me out of a man.

Cog - Problem, Reaction, Solution and 1010011010
The Number 12 Looks Like You - Paperweight Pigs

WHAT MEAN

Good evening. This is an existentialist search for the meaning to life.

One can study Natural Selection, and one can study behavioral patterns suggesting wills. Look at all the pretty colours!

Will to Meaning

Will to Power

Will to Pleasure

Will to Life

Free Will

Will of God

Determinism

Predestination

Cosmic Joke

Primordial Soup Destiny Maturation

Butterfly Effect

Here's an interestingly refreshing discovery:
Abiogenesis
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
"Primordial soup" redirects here. For the board game, see Primordial Soup (board game).
"Origin of life" redirects here. For views on the origins of life outside the natural sciences, see Creation myth.

...You know, it just dawned on me, it's a common reaction to assume; if you find any inkling of truth in the theory of evolution, yet don't understand it well; that we are the end product of the process. That leaves little to the imagination as far as Human Purpose, if we are all there is... But as I've pondered before, very many times, we're probably just another step, likely with no defined goal, maybe even an incredibly early stage... or likely still, maybe it's a completely unending process, save for the point in which the top race destroys the planet... or even the Universe... or at least the chain of time; obsessed with their youth.

So what just occurred to me was, if evolution is real, and there stands a pretty good argument that it is, then it still has absolutely nothing to do with the origin of life. It is rather, as Darwin began, the origin of the species.

The origin of life then must have his own study, its own theory; and that is abiogenisis. Where natural chemical reactions in inanimate matter started with amino acids, proteins, and nucleic acids. How replication and metabolism (photosynthesis) began.

And it just hit me... I was interested in the solution to the origin of life, sure. And I could study it and go into it for years. But I wasn't going to figure it out in bed with a laptop on Wikipedia. What struck me was, if abiogenisis and evolution were completely separate ideas, then there could feasibly be a third stage, at the very least, at any rate, a separate process still, in comparison to the former two: abiogenisis, evolution, posthuman.

Life gains just enough knowledge of their evolution that they purposely attempt to guide it towards whatever they want it to be. We could make, or have already made our race the final step in evolution. The next step is in progress. These are the current events. Die Übermenschen kommen, und Mann ist ein Laughingstock und eine schmerzliche Verlegenheit. Bitte gehen aus! Aufstieg Friedrich Nietzsche wieder! Es ist Ihre Zeit jetzt!

Posthuman Theories:

• Übergottheit Race
• Genetic Mutation favored into new physical species: faster, smarter, and possibly but not likely stronger than human
• Artificial Selection, Artificial Design, and Transfection / Transformation are likely used to guide evolution towards a transmutation into perceived desired traits, possibly into several species for different reasons
• Humans as we know them die out or become slaves
• Nanotech and Holographic AI
• Computer Generated Imagery evolves to a state indistinguishable from reality
• Artificial Intelligence evolves past human intelligence, possibly gaining sentience and emotion
• Humans farm machines as manual and intellectual slaves, as well as friends and lovers, and no longer necessarily require physical bodies
• H+ Bionic Immortals
• Humans append mechanical and otherwise manufactured components to their bodies to augment or repair organs and limbs
• Aging becomes unnecessary
• Death becomes eternally avoidable, save physical trauma
• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aubrey_de_Grey
• The Rise of the Machines
• AI gains sentience
• Humans destroyed or enslaved
• I, Robot

Time has come for lucidity, now begin.

I've decided it's time. My tattoo art is causing too much personal concern with its cluttery nature. I'm creating a new blog at http://rcarhart.blogspot.com called R Car Har / Art for drawings, specifically tattooey in nature, where I may move and continue my comic - style drawings as well.

Enjoy Cog. I have.

who u some two

2^9
=
512
=
4⁴ + 4^4
=
(2)2^2^2^2
=
(2²)^2² + (2²)^2^2
=
2^2^2^2^2/2/2/2/2/2/2/2
also,
http://www.befria.nu/elias/pi/binpi.html

Benchmark Trademark Current Events!

I was just editing a couple old posts on tattoos, as I've been designing new ones and redesigning old ones, in preparation to get one or two very soon, and I noticed that I had 99 posts...

So, Happy 100th post, motherfucker!!!!

...So I thought I'd make a worthwhile post about the current events in my life, where everything is coming together to be an extravaganza of eight million exciting, enthralling, and exuberant events that are taking me, ecstatic, on an elated expedition in this era of my life.

I just did my taxes online last night.
Phil and I are flying to visit our friends in San Jose in 11 days.
We are driving with two friends from there to Las Vegas, to see the sites, and gamble some for my first time, in 13 days.
The estimated date for direct deposit from my tax refund, plus a guaranteed paycheck direct deposit, is in 14 days.
I am picking up my new puppy in Las Vegas, who will have just turned eight weeks old, and meeting a long time online friend for the first time in person, in 15 days.
We are driving back to San Jose to spend more time with friends in 16 days.
Somewhere in there, we are planning on visiting our tattoo artist in San Jose, to get some more work done.
Unless we make insane winnings in Sin City, we will be flying back with the puppy in 19 days.

Then I get to walk her and train her and bathe her and pet her!

Oh, how I've enjoyed two days off...

All hits and I'm feeling fine
Uncontrolled and undivided
No vendetta

All's clear in a silent mind

Ain't no words that can describe it
So much better

All invited
Humans undivided
Why not set aside the time to understand your mind

Take it slowly

While facts are showing

Until we're there
Until we all arrive

Into the rip

I'm heading out again

Over my head

I can't get out of it

Firing line, firing line, firing line

I realize

Real life

from Cog - No Other Way, Real Life

Cradle in the Crater (The Number 12 Looks Like You)

We all thought the same

It was going to be okay

Thankful for my clean brain

We all thought the same

It was going to be okay

Scratched my head

Felt the dandruff piling up

Underneath my fingernails

Thankful for my clean brain

He was just a boy

Flying to space

In a cardboard box

Sleeping on the moon

In his dreams

Fly your flag forever

Don't let anything stop you

Cancer doesn't grow

There is no word for suffering!

Next time you fall asleep

Look down on us at Earth

And realize it may

Be better to forever

Count sheep

You're the captain of your ship and star

But for today you will shine

And be impervious to pain

We all admire your bravery, your bravery

With boots tied and chin up

We watch you fly away

Through stormy weather

Hold your ground

Keeping your eyes fixed on the prize

This must have been God's mistake!

And correction by giving you eternal life...

So young, but in good hands, in good hands

The strength of one hundred armies

To keep your evils at bay

To keep your evils at bay!

Just keep walking

And keep flying

And never give up

Just keep walking

And keep flying

And never give up

Never give up.

Disturbing facts explained for personal security...

Firstly, I am a firm believer that every phenomenon is causal, and can be explained by scientific relational process and Natural Law.

A few things in my experience have left me uneasy, as the pure wonderment puzzled me beyond my own ability to reason with them. This sensation however made me appreciate this comic enough to buy the shirt mentioned previously on this blog) which is the image in the last frame. I'll tackle the most pertinent group of phenomena whose mystery previously bothered me here, aside from particle physics vs. classical physics, and unified field theory vs. theory of everything:

1. Does electricity actually travel at the speed of light (c)?
2. If that speed, for light itself, is defined inside a vacuum, without any resisting obstacles, and light itself slows down through varying media, how does electricity do it, requiring a medium to travel at all, thus not occurring in a vacuum?
3. If Natural Law is totally efficient (η), and a line is the shortest distance between two contact points; why and how does lightning travel in an arc that is non-linear, and why and how can it have branches?
4. If electricity travels at c, and lightning strikes as electricity, and one can't notice light travelling from the clouds to Earth, why is the light emitted by lightning apparent to be travelling between the clouds and Earth at non-instant speeds, to the naked eye?

1. Yes. Electricity travels the same exact speed, through a wire, that light travels through a vacuum (c). But here are the problems with that:

• Electricity is the flow of electrons, and electrons have mass. Relativity says that massive bodies cannot travel at c. Only things without mass (zero rest mass) can (and must) travel at c.
• Even light cannot travel at c, when it is travelling through other substances, slowing down to travel through glass, water, air, etc. So, how can electrons travel at c, through copper?

I am not happy!

2. So electricity does indeed travel at c, but electrons themselves do not travel anywhere near c, within a wire. When an electron enters one end of a wire, another electron leaves the other end of the wire. This effect takes place at c, but they were not the same electron. The information, or the current, however, will have been the same as communicated to the beginning end of the wire, sans the wire's resistance.

I am happy.

3. In an electrical storm, the storm clouds are charged like giant capacitors in the sky. In the process of the water cycle forming the clouds, moisture accumulates as millions and millions of water droplets and ice suspended in the air. As the process of evaporation and condensation continues, these droplets collide with other moisture that is in the process of condensing as it rises. Also, the rising moisture may collide with ice or sleet that is in the process of falling to the Earth or located in the lower portion of the cloud. The importance of these collisions is that electrons are knocked off of the rising moisture, thus creating a charge separation.

The newly knocked-off electrons gather at the lower portion of the cloud, giving it a negative charge. The rising moisture that has just lost an electron carries a positive charge to the top of the cloud. Beyond the collisions, freezing plays an important role. As the rising moisture encounters colder temperatures in the upper cloud regions and begins to freeze, the frozen portion becomes negatively charged and the unfrozen droplets become positively charged. At this point, rising air currents have the ability to remove the positively charged droplets from the ice and carry them to the top of the cloud. The remaining frozen portion would likely fall to the lower portion of the cloud or continue on to the ground. Combining the collisions with the freezing, we can begin to understand how a cloud may acquire the extreme charge separation that is required for a lightning strike.

The strength or intensity of the electric field is directly related to the amount of charge buildup in the cloud. As the collisions and freezing continue to occur and the charges at the top and bottom of the cloud increase, the electric field becomes more and more intense -- so intense, in fact, that the electrons at the Earth's surface are repelled deeper into the Earth by the strong negative charge at the lower portion of the cloud. This repulsion of electrons causes the Earth's surface to acquire a strong positive charge. All that is needed now is a conductive path for the negative cloud bottom to contact the positive Earth surface. The strong electric field, being somewhat self-sufficient, creates this path.

That electric field causes the air around the cloud to "break down," allowing current to flow in an attempt to neutralize the charge separation. Simply stated, the air breakdown creates a path that short-circuits the cloud/Earth as if there were a long metal rod connecting the cloud to the Earth. The electric field causes the surrounding air to become separated into positive ions and electrons -- the air is ionized. This ionized, highly conductive air is known as plasma. Once the ionization process begins and plasma forms, a path is not created instantaneously. In fact, there are usually many separate paths of ionized air stemming from the cloud. These paths are typically referred to as step leaders.

The step leaders propagate toward the Earth in stages, which do not have to result in a straight line to the Earth. The air may not ionize equally in all directions. Dust or impurities in the air may cause the air to break down more easily in one direction, giving a better chance that the step leader will reach the Earth faster in that direction. Efficiency outside a straight line (η). Also, the shape of the electric field can greatly affect the ionization path. This shape depends on the location of the charged particles, which in this case are located at the bottom of the cloud and the Earth's surface. If the cloud is parallel to the Earth's surface, and the area is small enough that the curvature of the Earth is negligible, the two charge locations will behave as two charged parallel plates. The lines of force (electric flux) generated by the charge separation will be perpendicular to the cloud and Earth.

We are taught that the shortest distance between two points is a straight line; but in the case of electric fields, the lines of force (flux lines) may not follow the shortest distance, as the shortest distance does not always represent the path of least resistance.

I am happy.

4. So now we have an electrically charged cloud with ever-growing step leaders stretching out toward the Earth in stages. These leaders are faintly illuminated in a purplish glow and may sprout other leaders in areas where the original leaders bend or turn. Once begun, the leader will remain until the current flows, regardless of whether or not it is the leader that reaches the ground first. The leader basically has two possibilities: continue to grow in stages of growing plasma or wait patiently in its present plasma condition until another leader hits a target. These branches are looking for a target to expel the electrical charge, and one will become the most efficient path, thus connecting first, leaving the remaining branches to glow along with it.

As the step leaders approach the Earth, objects on the surface begin responding to the strong electric field. The objects reach out to the cloud by "growing" positive streamers. These streamers also have a purplish color and appear to be more prominent on sharp edges. The human body can and does produce these positive streamers when subjected to a strong electric field such as that of a storm cloud. In actuality, anything on the surface of the Earth has the potential to send a streamer. Once produced, the streamers do not continue to grow toward the clouds; bridging the gap is the job of the step leaders as they stage their way down. The streamers wait patiently, stretching upward as the step leaders approach.

After the step leader and the streamer meet, the ionized air (plasma) has completed its journey to the Earth, leaving a conductive path from the cloud to the Earth. With this path complete, current flows between the Earth and the cloud. This discharge of current is nature's way of trying to neutralize the charge separation. The flash we see when this discharge occurs is not the strike -- it is the local effects of the strike.

Any time there is an electrical current, there is also heat associated with the current. Since there is an enormous amount of current in a lightning strike, there is also an enormous amount of heat. In fact, a bolt of lightning is hotter than the surface of the Sun. This heat is the actual cause of the brilliant white-blue flash that we see.

When a leader and a streamer meet and the current flows (the strike), the air around the strike becomes extremely hot. So hot that it actually explodes because the heat causes the air to expand so rapidly. The explosion is soon followed by what we all know as thunder.

When there are many other branches that flash at the same time as the main strike, and the main strike flickers or dims a few more times, the branches that you see are actually the step leaders that were connected to the leader that made it to its target. When the first strike occurs, current flows in an attempt to neutralize the charge separation. This requires that the current associated with the energy in the other step leaders also flows to the ground. The electrons in the other step leaders, being free to move, flow through the leader to the strike path. So when the strike occurs, the other step leaders are providing current and exhibiting the same heat flash characteristics of the actual strike path. After the original strike occurs, it is usually followed by a series of secondary strikes. These strikes follow only the path of the main strike; the other step leaders do not participate in this discharge.

In nature, what we see is often not what we get, and this is definitely the case with the secondary strikes. It is very possible that the main strike can be followed by 30 to 40 secondary strikes. Depending on the time delay between the strikes, we may see what looks like one long-duration main strike, or a main strike followed by other flashes along the path of the main strike. These conditions are easy to understand if we realize that the secondary strikes can occur while the flash from the main stroke is still visible. Obviously, this would cause a viewer to think that the main-strike flash lasted longer than it actually did. By the same token, the secondary strikes may occur after the flash from the main strike ends, making it appear that the main strike is flickering.

The actual light you see when viewing a lightning strike is the air associated with he strike, exploding. Explosion chain reactions take longer time to travel than actual light or electricity, so we can see the light emited by the fire, actually travelling along the strike path, much in the same way that we familiarly see lightning occur several seconds before actually hearing the explosions, as the sound waves also travel much slower than c.

I am happy.

The last lightning images are from this video. See 2:25...

Electrical information derived from http://www.jimloy.com/physics/electric.htm and http://science.howstuffworks.com/lightning.htm/printable

Dear Jesus: A Slipknot Mashup

Feels like a burn from which you never learn
Cause and effect, you jealous ass

You can't kill me
Cuz I'm already inside you

I am my Father's son
He's a phantom, a mystery and that leaves me nothing!

I tried - You lied to me for so long
Everywhere I go, there's a sense of it
Freak on my antics and give me a choice
Doesn't matter if I give a shit
It's shit that you gave me

Look me in my brand new eye

Saved - You're such a slave - I don't expect a
Name - You don't care - I wasn't witness -
I can't be a part of a system such as this
Hard eyes - Glow right - In my - Darkness - Again
With the sickness, rengade blisters, sisters,
Salivate, litigate, liberate, madness, sadness
Fuck this - How long have I had this?
I don't need this - Outta my business
Insert, engage, betrayed, my God
Fraud

I found you
Leanin' out of an open window
You laughed (my fingers clenched)
Too perfect, far too careless
I couldn't help myself - I just took you

I'm cold, I'm ugly
I'm always confused by everything
I can stare into a thousand eyes
But every smile hides a bold-faced lie

I save all the bullets from ignorant minds
Your insults get stuck in my teeth as they grind

God what the fuck is wrong
You act like you knew it all along
Your timing sucks, your silence is a blessing

All I ever wanted out of you was
Something you could never be
Now take a real good look at
What you fucking do to me

I see you in me

I keep my scars from prying eyes
Incapable of ever knowing why
Somebody breathe, I've got to have an answer

Why am I so fascinated by
Bigger pictures, better things
But I don't care what you think
You'll never understand me

What the hell - did I - do to deserve - all of this?

Fuck!

All I hear is human noise
You made your own fuckin' choice
I belong to only me
Silence for my revelry

Somebody explain this
You don't care cuz you don't exist
What the fuck is this another joke?
Reckoning!

Good riddance - though I'm sad to say
I didn't get to kill you
Rhetoric - Better look both ways
I gotta get an arm through

What the fuck is up? Get the fuck away
Run if you want to
Innocent? You're a guilty conscience
Laugh last - break through
Stain

Take that, mothafucker!

Black parts and dark matter.

So the other day I was pissed off about being a human, right? Stay with me. I'm having an incredible veritable ball right now and loving life immensely, that's no doubt. But it's the general population I'm worried about.

Time is relative. Time is a way we move through space. Time is a part of space. Time is in space. Time is insignificantly measured of the Earth and the Sun.
Physics is always calculating. Natural Law is constant. Nothing strays. Change is constant. Paradoxes cancel themselves. Information has no inherent meaning. Life is absurd at the quaintest level and in the profoundest sense. Autism strikes like cancer.

Scientists predict the state of the Universe just after the Big Bang, but how would time have behaved in such an environment - especially there being no Earth-- or Sun to measure it by? Time being completely relative, relying on its surrounding events to exist, time was certainly not the same as it is "today."

Perfect circles are but an illusion; everything is instead spiral and/or elliptical, that it can be open-ended.

Natural selection is halted by social habits formed by mass religion, and by mass production of new technologies and advances in health care. There is no balance and no goal. We are so proud and obsessed with ourselves, we are trying to live as is forever, when we could be evolving to a possible immortal, impervious, all knowing creature. We don't know our purpose. We reproduce on emotional whims, with no regard for public betterment, and then we harbor not only miserable abandonment, but slack mutations that nature would have weeded out. Survival of the fittest becomes complete anarchy. This beautiful machinery becomes a cold and harsh device. Everybody dies.

We sin.

299,792,458

-Me

We all create this imagery. We all increase this lunacy. Floating, melting. Open sores for exploration. Exploding worlds. Surrounding imaginations? This beautiful scenario can't last forever. We must go see the conclusion. Starting a new species, classify nothing. Life grows with trees on high. Nature creates this mechanical lust. Nature forms this force fed trust. Cancellation. Motivation. Creativity. We will soon live in peace. We will soon die in peace. All Bodies. Contortion.

Don't Think. Don't speak. I will do this for you. Every natural thought or feeling you've ever had will change tonight. Trust the pedestal, for now we become a higher being. I am your new mind. A tribe within itself. A vision I will display, to blind the caring. I have regret. Too late....

I am a cult by definition. I am friend by first impression. My task: to recycle this earth. To not repeat human history. Start from scratch, rid every sound. Deconstruct, deconstruct all. I've bid every method into the hands of my employees. I am a cult by definition. I am a scientist by default. I have saved you. Now you will follow my journey, my destiny. Tonight's your death. Resurrect my new you.

I am a cult by definition. I will end this human world. This world is shit and I have proved this with my followers. Fuck humanity. End life. You are now dead, and I soon will be.

Disease, injury, madness.

-Between the Buried and Me

Conversations with god in them

I've been writing again... about my own personal philosophy, and sorting thoughts out on paper (or more accurately, in notepad), and I recently got to exercise and have my thoughts briefly criticized.
From a facebook conversation this morning (edited only for formatting, removed names and timestamps):

she
Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods - Albert Einstein

me
"I believe in Spinoza's God, who reveals himself in the lawful harmony of all that exists, but not in a God who concerns himself with the fate and the doings of mankind... If something is in me which can be called religious then it is the unbounded admiration for the structure of the world so far as our science can reveal it."

(ps, I read your comment like 80 times)

she
"likes this" I thought this quote was interesting bc I didn't know Einstein gave a shit about g-ds..

me
Einstein was a non-practicing Jew; the first part of my last quote was a response to a telegram from a Rabbi reading, "Do you believe in God? Stop. Answer paid. 50 words." ...His philosophy was closely pantheistic: everything in nature across the Universe, especially natural law and existence themselves are (is) one, and that is identical to God; but that the concept of God is not a sentient being having created or actively influencing the Universe, "He" only exists philosophically. If God is all there is, It is a law that causes effects to occur in its own cosmological soup of matter/energy... If God is sentient, it is because we are sentient: a way for the Universe to know itself, as He has no sensations or experiences.
Einstein's passionate, admittedly child-like curiosity for the inner workings of the cosmos were, in his words, an attempt to "know God's thoughts; the rest are details."

me
Einstein also followed Schopenhauer's World as Will and Representation:
-Man can do what he wants, but never choose what it is that he wants.
-human experience of things consists of how they appear to us, rather than directly comprehending things as they are in and of themselves. (Phenomenon vs. Nuomenon)

...as a physicist, he refused to accept the literal randomness in quantum mechanics that require probability rather than constants.
"I am convinced that He does not play dice."
This is the quote that got me researching his life and philosophy aside from just his patents, theories, formulas, and moustache.

me
(Wikipedia:) Like many other aesthetic theories, Schopenhauer's centers on the concept of genius. Genius, according to Schopenhauer, is possessed by all people in varying degrees and consists of the capacity for aesthetic experience. An aesthetic experience occurs when an individual perceives an object and understands by it not the individual object itself, but the Platonic form of the object. The individual is then able to lose himself in the object of contemplation and, for a brief moment, escape the cycle of unfulfilled desire by becoming "the pure subject of will-less knowing." Those who have a high degree of genius can be taught to communicate these aesthetic experiences to others, and objects that communicate these experiences are works of art.

me
I have personally contemplated my own philosophy for years, going from Christianity to agnosticism to atheism to agnosticism and so on til I started picking apart different /types/ of atheism and agnosticism, and recently, I've decided that the only agnosticism I have in being a secular humanist is:
Am I an absurdist nihilist existentialist; or am i a freethinking pantheist dadaist?

me
In being absurdist, I find no meaning or purpose in living in the chaotic Universe, and answering the question in the first place is both impossible and false--humanly, but not necessarily logically. I also have to keep in mind that that a logical conclusion denying Human purpose is not certainly falsifying. As a nihilist, I would argue frivilously, that finding an answer is totally irrelevant, as there is no answer because nothing means anything anyway. Information has no inherent meaning, and any meaning applied to any given information is relative opinion, deeming it arbitrary. As an existentialist, I must decide what meaning my experiences give this question, if any, and having assumed prescribed meaning is nonexistant, I will fail to come to a conclusion. My personal quest in life becomes adventure, and I will probably look for meaning in it until I die.

me
In being a freethinker, I must separate supernatural phenomena from my rational inspection of life. I must also consider traditional dogmata irrelevant, and logic king in solving this model. No one's opinion, even my own, can have any influence on my decision until completely interpreted and compared with fact. As a pantheist, I would accept rationally that a supreme being or event created the Universe in the form of an elegant recipe, and I must do so simply by contemplating natural events and laws, and tracing them back as far as they are observable. My only argument for a meaning to life would be that I am a way for the Universe to experience itself; that I and everything around me are one, are God. And I can't possibly prove this, so it is completely illogical. As a dadaist, this absurd illogic that disgusts me more than anything I've ever sensed, magically and patently generating the truest aesthetic I have ever witnessed. I don't know if that qualifies me as a genius or more of a nut.

me
Paradoxically, I must believe and disbelieve simultaneously that the God, in and as my Universe, is present and alive; and that life (is both undyingly miserable, and) exists just for fun; and on the other hand; I also understand that I can never know whether there is any meaning to it all; so I must also believe that God's existence, and the existence of meaning in life (which I generally accept to be interchangeable concepts) are neither true nor false.

So right now I'll have to stick with being a secular humanist agnostic about being an absurdist nihilist existentialist or a freethinking pantheist dadaist.

...At least that leaves room for me to see beauty in every aspect of life, and a basis for morality.

she
Bjustwow... I need to read this 80 times, but on a basic level I agree that life is definitely fucking miserable and incredibly wonderful at the same time!!

me
:-) Don't forget to expand them all haha. This was what I was trying to explain about personal meaning in life only being a goal, that we cannot know our purpose, if there is one.

she
I think we can know a purpose or atleast have one... (even if we refuse to acknowledge it)

me
ok so what is it?

she
You gotta figure it out yabig deal! It'snot like you can research it on wikipedia, or that it is the same for all of humanity...

me
Then it would be a personal goal. I'm trying to convey that a personal goal or definition of their own meaning is a separate concept than Human Purpose.

she
I would venture to say that if "we" do have a purpose collectively it would be to exist in Loving consensual harmony w/ eachother.. (like That will ever happen)

me
For instance, right now, you could say my meaning of life is the quest for the definition and existence of Human Purpose. Human Purpose is something that will be fulfilled though only if and when we as a community of organisms finish the evolutionary paths we started some billions of years ago.

she
I guess if you are looking at us from a science perspective we might as well be mindless insects (and to be sure the dumb ones are breeding!) Lol

me
*shrug...* We're not doing anything positive to influence anything other than our own wants... and the widely less intelligent offspring are a whole different misfortune.

she
I don't think Einstein chose to be an uber awesome amazing smarty-pants.. That's just what he was (in that particular lifetime) are you proposing we just drift through life w/out goals or ambition bc it's all effing pointless anyhow? I would partly agree..

she
But if I have to fester here on this squalid carcass of a planet.. Ima atleast make something of myself!

me
As I mentioned before, we can't chose what we want, only what we do. So yes, do what you want, but no, at this point I don't see a global point in living that seems like something we should all strive for. And as for the Earth being a putrid hole, I would beg to differ... It is the only life-harnessing seed observable so far... Humanity's action is the catalyst for shameful sordidness causing misery.

me
As possibly my favorite line in any Between the Buried and Me song goes, "keeper of the stars / I hope to never find / we are just mortal souls / left to die."

she
Yay thx! Indeed there are things I wish I didn't want, but can't help it in the least. And Earth itself is effing beautiful - it's US who are making it sad and ugly. I concur

me
In regards to drifting through life without goals or ambitions because there is no point, I would argue that we have built-in tools that give us inherent goals and ambitions:
A) evolutionary instincts
B) emotions
C) logical minds
...So we are able to make decisions based on what we have perceived and are perceiving, and can sympathize with how that will affect others' situations and future situations.
Also, because of emotion, we assign "good" and "bad" to events and situations, and strive to achieve more personal inventory on the side of "good" than "bad."
Hopefully, an individual can see that they not only need to strive for these pleasantries for themselves, but that each action also affects others' situations.
Therefore, we develop personal and public models of morality to persuade our own decisions and decisions as a people.
This indicates a partial description of Purpose, but not the end result.

she
Heynow, not everyone has a Logical mind. Some pple (likeme) are Completely emotional/irrational on a daily basis!!

me
you still have a logical mind or you wouldn't be able to follow daily conversations or solve simple tasks
tl;dr, you're a woman

me
We should continue this convo seriously though, it has been enjoyable.

--------end--------
(This was actually partially continued from a conversation in texts, hiighlighted parts of a piece of phone are as follows.)

she
Do you think the universe/vast emptiness is actually what consists of All there is, and somehow dictates our destinies?

me
Kinda
Destiny exists in a sense But i believe in free will and the universe may be one of many or an infinite multiverse
Free will is guided will to power, pleasure, and other goals

she
Oh wow, I have a hard enought time wrapping my head around one universe!

me
Me too but i spend a loooooot of time thinking about it and altered states put things in new perspective. I dont believe in astrology but i do in chaos theory

she
I was just discussing w/ someone how I feel that at times my life will be going on one set on track & then BAM! Something will happen and it seems like the whole universe will realign to construct a new path based on that change
It's like building blocks I guess lol.

me
which is kinda what you're talking about the butterfly effect

she
Def. Man, and sometimes it's something small like meeting someone on the street or something Huge like a car accident!

me
Totally. Think about how much the events over time are changed just by human interactions. From buying groceries to starting wars

she
I know! That's why it's SO Important to avoid negativity. I never even realized it til now. It gives me panic attacks.

me
Then think about how small and insignificant it all is compared to the enormous cosmic events that formed the universe
I remember talking to you about negativity not mattering in cali walking down winchester blvd
Not that i don't worry about shit, just gotta sort out what matters

she
Yeah. Well I don't believe in right vs wrong. But I have become so consumed by... Things not good that it's affective and it's pissing me off!

me
Oh! And yeah theres no good and evil but there is benifit and handicap. We just dont know whats what coz we dont know our purpose
[your meaning in life] is worth living for- you created your own free will to pleasure- thats not a purpose though

This has been brewing inside me

Some old bitch came to me at work a couple days ago with a laptop saying she was a "computer nerd, and in other words knew nothing about computers." ...I had to suppress my desire to rage and tell her she was completely wrong about the definition of the word nerd, and what the hell did she know anything about.

First of all, you are coming to me for help because I myself am a computer nerd. You, on the other hand, are a computer- and possibly an everything- idiot, and in other words are legally retarded. Here is the 2009 definition of nerd (mostly from wikipedia):

• Nerd is a term often bearing a derogatory connotation or stereotype, that refers to a smart person who passionately or obsessively pursues intellectual activities, esoteric knowledge, or other obscure interests that are age-inappropriate, rather than engaging in more social or popular activities, such as exercising or dating.
• Some nerds show a pronounced interest in subjects which others tend to find dull or boring, or just simply too complex and difficult to comprehend, or overly mature for their age, especially topics related to science, mathematics and technology. On the opposite end of the spectrum, nerds may show an interest in activities that are viewed by their peers as stupid and immature for their age, such as trading cards, comic books, television programs, flims, role-playing games, video games and other things relating to fantasy and science fiction.

The word most synonymous for nerd is geek, ergo Geek Squad. Geek is as follows:

• The word geek is a slang term, noting individuals as "a peculiar or otherwise odd person, especially one who is perceived to be overly obsessed with one or more things including those of intellectuality, electronics, etc.
• a computer expert or enthusiast (a term of pride as self-reference, but often considered offensive when used by outsiders.)

Fuckin' NERD!

Now THESE are nerds.

PS, I would like this shirt and also maybe this one.
But also this one and THAT'S IT!

Every god damn day.

Merry crismas, fuckers.

(An old drawing I made roundabouts 2004)

What If

Maybe some type of possibility

could become a theory

be part of something

What if in the future

people just decided

no more leaders

fighting to control us?

Freedom.

What if?

I know you want it

Well we've come to start it

With you

What if in the future

people just united?

What if

life was

just an

illusion?

made up

by you!

Some things don't seem right

Change is in sight

Some things are so wrong

Life lasts too long

I know you want it

Well we've come to start it

With you

Cog - What If

On the Origin of the Species

This is from Cesar Millan's How to Raise the Perfect Dog

...The moment her first (ever) puppy was born, Binky proved she was going to be a supermom. She appeared both fascinated and thrilled by her new infant, immediately licking her clean and biting off the umbilical cord as if she had done it a thousand times before...
...Binky's hydrocephalic (deformed head) puppy illustrates a fact that I believe humans very much need to understand--motherhood, for a dog, is not an emotional experience, it is an instinctual experience. Her hydrocephalic puppy was born dead, and Binky totally ignored it. She made no attempt to revive it or to clean it. Her only concern was delivering her living puppies and making sure they were safe and healthy.